Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Life as Performance Art

The whirlwind pace of my life doesn't seem to be stopping, or even slowing down. My partner started his new assignment this week, with all the scheduling chaos that brings; there are court dates, and radio interviews, and work-day task lists bursting at the seams. There are papers to write and lawns to mow and meetings to set up and attend, both regular events and one-off meetings for projects and plans.There are new bills and old wounds lurking in unexpected places, acting like time bombs and booby traps, turning navigating my life into a high-stepping obstacle course. If there were music, it would resemble a strange dance, but it's performance art nonetheless.

And yet even when it all seems chaotic enough to swamp me (you know, every third hour or so), I still keep on. This morning, I said that when there seem to be no good moves to make, the only thing left is to make no move at all.

That's harder than it sounds, at least for me.

But when I do hold on to my seat, sometimes literally, and have the courage to be still, then life can continue to happen, at times beautiful, at times tragic, but always on its own terms, exactly as it needs to be.

It reminds me of what a friend told me once (okay, maybe three times):
"Don't just do something; sit there."